The Power of Art

Art is an expression of self in its purest form. When you intertwine an artist's passion to create with your deep personal story the art becomes an inseparable part of you as your body becomes the canvas and your trust in the artist grows exponentially. My journey began with a simple idea. In the beginning I wasn't aware of the profound impact this journey would have on me. How it would bring me back to life during my darkest days. How is would teach me trust. How it would leave me in awe of God's gifts and creation. How it would challenge me to be brave and to be the me I have always seen when I looked in the mirror. To my artist, my dear friend: Thank you for the gift of your incredible and hauntingly beautiful art. I am so blessed beyond words that our paths crossed and am honored, so very honored. If tattoos are truly a window to the soul, my tattoos have captured mine perfectly.

Free

Why spend your life building roadblocks? An extensive laundry list of reasons why you can’t and then not even try? I will scratch, claw, dig and blast through the road blocks that stand in my way. I will not live in the box of your design. Where there is a wall, I will fashion a door, a lock, I will fashion a key, no cage that shall hold me, I shall be free.

The Ying and Yang of Trust and Control

Type A personality is a term tossed around alot. By definition, it probably describes me to a tee with control being at the top of the list. Control and trust go hand in hand in a sick kind of balancing act. The more controlling you are, inherently, the less you trust. I struggle with this daily in my relationship with God. My trust in His will is secure so long as His will aligns with my will. But once it doesn't, my controlling nature takes over and my trust erodes. But that's not how it's suppose to work, is it. So I wonder, is a Type A personality really a personality at all or is it a symptom of someone who has had their trust in others destroyed over the years, and now trust is replaced with mistrust and control takes over. If I look honestly at myself, my trust has been eroded over the years and was completely lost due to the horrific incident between our children last April. When trust is lost, it is hard not to be consumed by control. This has lead me to try and control happenings under our roof, at work, with my husband, with friends, and with my relationship with God. It is depleating and exhausting constantly trying to micromanage everyone in your life. And as such, because I don't really control all those things, when they don't go my way, it makes me furious. A key element of this healing journey I am on needs to be re-building trust in every aspect of my life. So this week I took a huge step towards healing. While I had said, "I trust you" before, what I really meant was "I trust you to a point". I realized the words were empty as my trust was limited by my under lying control of the situation. It took every ounce of BRAVE I had this week to say, "I trust you completely" and mean it. This time it was different and I did trust completely and it feels AWESOME! Now that's something to build on!

Destination Kinshasa

200 miles to go...