The other day I received a sort of guided imagery scenario. Not for relaxation, but to provide a glimpse into a window, a scary window most never consider.
Imagine you are dropped into Iraq with nothing. You dont speak the language. You are not dressed appropriately. Not for the conditions. Not for the region. No food. No water. What do you do? Stay put? Walk and look around? Walk and look for help? Since you dont know the language or the body language and mannerisms are you even able to recognize if someone is offering you help, or is threatening you? If you decide they are trying to help, do you accept it? or shy from it since you are clearly a White/Westerner, and frankly you are not in Kansas anymore. If you turn the help down are you in more danger, more jeopardy? If you accept the help do you allow yourself to trust the person helping you? Or while accepting the help are you immediately looking for an path of escape if needed. Trying to take in every site, sound, smell, in case it can help to save your life. Do you risk sleeping? If you do, is it restful or fitful? How long can you keep this up. Its likely horribly exhausting physically, and mentally/emotionally crushing. How many days can you keep it up? One? Two? Ten? A Month? If you were stuck in a world that was foreign; a world you did not understand; a world that didnt understand you; could you be happy? would you forget what its like to be happy? What if, you never knew what happiness was prior to this? What view would you have of the world? If you suddently treated kindly and with Respect; with Love. Would you even know it?
This is the world that our Kids with trauma have. Living in a constant war zone. Unable to control anything. Those that had such rough starts that its really not possible to fully understand the horrors they have faced. When the best thing you can say about your entire childhood is that at least your mother cared enough to carry you to term rather than abort you, but not enough to care before, during, or after your birth.
How scary a window is that to look through. These kids might be 5 or they might be 15 or even 30. Love can heal many wounds. But Human love (shaking my head negatively, I think) can only go so far. Perhaps divine Love can heal all wounds, and when they say "All you need is Love", if its divine, maybe they are right.
I salute you Parents of Trauma. Few can begin to grasp the depth of the challenges you face each hour of each day. And that cost extracted from them.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Monday, April 15, 2013
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Blind.. but that's ok (maybe)
this morning was one of those days. You know, the ones that just get off to a wacky start that you're not sure its worth taking another step, unless its back to bed. Actually. It wasn't just one of those days, it was worse. For reason yet to be determined, I just had a hard time coping with the dog moaning, the mad rush to be sure I has soccer stuff ready. lunch. coffee. Homework lines up for after school. and 4 nuggets running around doing things young nuggets do in the morning before school.
Driving to work I tried to reflect. Didnt get any divine answers, none that I could detect anyway. But did have the thought that "hey this has been a rough start, BP is high, and I'm stressed to the max already and I'm barely away from the house before work. I must be trying to swim upstream. Or across the current. Whatever it is, I'm not swimming WITH the current downstream."
thought about the post from the other day. Wonder what it is that I'm not seeing this morning. What is clouded from my view. Hidden beyond the stress, the dog yelping, and everything else that started me off behind the eight-ball. Since I didnt get the divine inspiration, I figured. Ok how do I trust. How do I just go with this, and ride the chaos and the stress. Dunno. But decided to just drink some coffee, turn up the Harry Potter audiobook in the car, and see where the day went from there. All in all, it went quite well considering the rocky start. Tomorrow promises to be even more of a challenge, but we know for months that this week would be rough. Almost through it.
Driving to work I tried to reflect. Didnt get any divine answers, none that I could detect anyway. But did have the thought that "hey this has been a rough start, BP is high, and I'm stressed to the max already and I'm barely away from the house before work. I must be trying to swim upstream. Or across the current. Whatever it is, I'm not swimming WITH the current downstream."
thought about the post from the other day. Wonder what it is that I'm not seeing this morning. What is clouded from my view. Hidden beyond the stress, the dog yelping, and everything else that started me off behind the eight-ball. Since I didnt get the divine inspiration, I figured. Ok how do I trust. How do I just go with this, and ride the chaos and the stress. Dunno. But decided to just drink some coffee, turn up the Harry Potter audiobook in the car, and see where the day went from there. All in all, it went quite well considering the rocky start. Tomorrow promises to be even more of a challenge, but we know for months that this week would be rough. Almost through it.
Sunday, April 7, 2013
..those who Believe but do not see..
Blessed be those who Believe but do not see...
Those were the words said to a man named Thomas. A doubtful man, but one who came around when presented evidence to his human eyes.
How easy it is, and quite frankly how human it is, to believe only that which we can see. (an by extension, taste, touch, feel, hear). But there are plenty of things that many just take for granted or (gasp) on faith. Things that do not register in the human perception. Take Love. Pretty hard to ..prove.. its there, or if it even exists, but few doubt it.
As I listened to a story about Thomas, the story was re-framed. Not simply about how easy it is to "believe" in things when times are good. When we are healthy. Free of $$ worried or debt. Enjoy success in business and/or in play. But framed about how much greater the opportunity for growth, personal growth, exists when to try (try being the operative word) to believe during the difficult, challenging, heart wrenching times. The times where, as humans, we are just incapable or reaching a rationale explanation or even approach to a believable answer to the question "Why?".
To some is a Spiritual things. To just throw you hands up in frustration/desperation and say to that higher power you believe in, and say "I don't get it. I just don't get it. I don't like it. In fact I frickin' mad as Hades. But I accept it. I accept that don't know everything, and this is just beyond me. So I trust in you"
To those that are not Spiritual in a Religious sense, maybe you just toss your hands up, in much the same way, and say the same things. But for you, you just come to accept that its just one of those things, and things will turn around. So its time to move on.
Easier said than done for all, to be sure. But a nice perspective to an old story, to chew on nonetheless.
Peace
Those were the words said to a man named Thomas. A doubtful man, but one who came around when presented evidence to his human eyes.
How easy it is, and quite frankly how human it is, to believe only that which we can see. (an by extension, taste, touch, feel, hear). But there are plenty of things that many just take for granted or (gasp) on faith. Things that do not register in the human perception. Take Love. Pretty hard to ..prove.. its there, or if it even exists, but few doubt it.
As I listened to a story about Thomas, the story was re-framed. Not simply about how easy it is to "believe" in things when times are good. When we are healthy. Free of $$ worried or debt. Enjoy success in business and/or in play. But framed about how much greater the opportunity for growth, personal growth, exists when to try (try being the operative word) to believe during the difficult, challenging, heart wrenching times. The times where, as humans, we are just incapable or reaching a rationale explanation or even approach to a believable answer to the question "Why?".
To some is a Spiritual things. To just throw you hands up in frustration/desperation and say to that higher power you believe in, and say "I don't get it. I just don't get it. I don't like it. In fact I frickin' mad as Hades. But I accept it. I accept that don't know everything, and this is just beyond me. So I trust in you"
To those that are not Spiritual in a Religious sense, maybe you just toss your hands up, in much the same way, and say the same things. But for you, you just come to accept that its just one of those things, and things will turn around. So its time to move on.
Easier said than done for all, to be sure. But a nice perspective to an old story, to chew on nonetheless.
Peace
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