Good bye Bucha for now and HELLO lovely Lady!

After wrestling N into the airport kicking and screaming and a barf fest on the way into town, we left our apartment digs in busy town of Bucharamanga after two and a half weeks and arrived in the beautiful city of Medellin. At one glance, i decided i am going to punch any adoptive family who is adopting from Medellin and dares complain about spending 5 weeks in this place. It is pure paradise! At the same time, I am super sad for all the Bucha families that only see Bogota and Bucha....like my boys :( . I am not regretting the decision to come here for one min. and would encourage other families to do the same, even if it is only for a few days.

We had an amazing time here and missed so much. It is easy to forget we are not on vacation here and that there are things that need to be done in Bogota, so alas, we will head, begrudgingly back to Bogota then back to Bucha and will remember our days here fondly as we will surely return when the kids are a big older.

Tale of the Giant Bug

So of course the boys arn't around and N drags me into the kitchen and points at the hanging laundry at the end of the room. I look bewildered at the laundry wondering what the heck she is saying. In all my spanish, I have never heard this word before. She repeats it more insistantly and I walk over and start wondering if she want to change into one of the dresses hanging on the line. I pull each one forward and she say no no no. I come to one of K's red dresses and she gets all excited. I tell her tomorrow she can wear it but she is still shaking her head. That when I notice a ciacada looking bug that is the side of a bird sitting on the hanger! I don't remember what i uttered at that point but N starts yelling "Mata lo mata lo" (kill it kill it) and she is clearly terrified by its presence. All I am thinking is "with what? A baseball bat! That thing is huge and my clean laundry is hanging below it!" So I decide to go the tupperware route and trap it between a container and a lid, not sure what I am going to do if the plan fails and it starts flying around the apartment. Luckily, the plan is successful and I now have it banging around in this tupperwere container. And then, the thing started to scream, like blood curdling, my arm is in a car door, ear bleeding scream like hundreds of little fairies dying. What the heck is going on E2 would say! So as qucikly as i could, I rushed the thing over to the window and set it free. Be free nasty screaming bug, and go bug someone else!

Hmmmmmm....big sigh

Trying to be brutally honest here and well, it has been 2 straight weeks of 24-7 K. Some might say what we are seeing is a result of adding a new sister, but I would whole heartedly disagree. I think what we are seeing is K's behaviors that have been occurring for the last year without the benefit of the distractions of everyday life. You know, the stuff you can ignore on a daily basis because of work, the internet, tv and distractions of activities and day care. What we are seeing in her behaviors makes me question her brain development and how the connections were originally made as they seem to be totally and completely mis-wired. My initial thought was that she has the emotional maturity of a 2 yr old which is what we have been told by her therapist. But that doesn't seem to explain it either. Her reactions to everyday situations are opposite what they should be. Your brother gets hurt, you laugh and mock him. Your sister brushes your leg getting off the couch, you would think your arm was cut off. I have lost track of the number of poor choices that have been made during the last 2 weeks which include but are not limited to sticking finger everywhere they shouldn't be, doors, body parts (in full length mirror none the less...ick!), etc, dumping a cup of laundry soap in the toilet, soiling your pants, forgetting how to put in socks, forgetting to not start peeing before sitting on the toilet. A total and complete lack of cause and effect thinking. And then there are the blank stares. Oh the blank stares...totally checked out in another world, as the strangers at the ball parked remarked, in her own little world, stepping into traffic, falling countless time because she is not watching where she is going, stuck on the toilet because she is staring blankly at the wall and can't seem to put the thoughts together as to how to get off. We have used every therapeutic technique we know in the last 2 weeks and it seems like nothing is getting through. Oh honey, I know it is hard for you to remember how to get off the toilet so take as much time as you need.....I read these stories of other kids that have had malnutrition, trauma, unknown histories, etc, I fear for your future little girl, I fear that you are driving your siblings away with your bullying and mocking, I fear that your birthday parties will all be with adults because the other kids at school tell me how you hit them or were mean to them, I am afraid of how you will navigate through this challenging world without the skills of logic. I wonder if we can teach you, and if you will ever learn.......

Moving Along

Went to the notary today for some more signatures and all the kids seemed to be in a funk. Seems like its a combination of tired and not wanting to be sitting at a notary that early in the morning. Also got N's visa photos today. I had tried my dark colored shirt on her yesterday, and she was having none of it, so with everyones moods today, I was expecting the worst, but she smiled like a champ. Should be a pretty cute picture.
Have I mentioned how everyone here is drop dead gorgeous? Even this homeless man on the sidewalk we keep walking by could be in the cover of GQ. I suppose just because you are hot doesn't mean you cant be homeless. We were at the club swimming the other day and my pasty white self was feeling pretty self conscious among all the sharply dressed, beautifully tan and chiseled folks doing lap after lap in the pool or soaking up the rays while I hid under my t-shirt and hat hoping not to get scalded. Amazing how noticable those few extra pounds suddenly seem in a bathing suit when you start to feel like everyone around you just walked off the cover of a magazine. I do however know that in order to be so sharply dressed all the time, you need to have HOT shoes and there is an abudance of SHOES here that Car*rie Brads*haw would drool over. Starting to wonder how many pairs I can fit in my carry on. Good thing sis is coming!

Parque De Agua

Heard yesterday that our case was submitted to Court on Monday and that I should expect 3 weeks before I might hear from the judge. This is along the same time frame other families have seen, but we also know there is a new TB test required in Bogota that we understand takes 72 hours to read, so that might extend my and the girls time here some. The 3 weeks does give us some time to possibly get to Medellin or Bogota to have the test done ahead of time. So far enjoying my time here and loving the fresh fruit and walking to the store and church and not having to get in a car every time we want to go somewhere. I made corn soup today with potatos, chicken fresh herbs and peas shucked from the pods, with sliced aquacate on top and crema fresca. It was wonderful! It is nice to be able so easily to make food that doesn't have so many preservatives in it. As best as I try at home, I usually don't have the time. We bought beef for fajitas the other day (which I put way to much spice in and the kids hated it..oops), but even the smell of fresh beef is so different. And the salt and sugar. You don't realize how much salt and sugar is in our food until it isn't there. Everytime we have gone to the store we have bought different fruit not knowing what it is. The last one was the granadilla which is hard and orange on the outside and has green snot with seeds on the inside. Kind of really liking it if I can get any before N slurps it up! More notary stuff tomorrow and visa photo for N. Hopefully some more pool time as well!

I don't miss it. Ok well maybe a little.

During our time in Colombia, we had a chance to head over to "the club" and go swimming. They had a pretty nice lap pool. I think it might have been a 50m length. But after only a few hundred meters I was done. I did swim a few more lengths a bit later. But it was nice. Not like I want to sign up for a half ironman tomorow. But the workout was different. I could tell my cardio fitness level wasn't so hot. Not sure where or how I'd get any lap time in with 4 nuggets running around the house. But it would be nice.

Something to talk about..

At least within our family this has kicked off some interesting discussions. I'll leave the politics and personal commentary out of this for the time being and see what the chatter comes back as.

http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/red-thread-adoptive-family-forum/2011/aug/3/united-states-unicef-war-international-adoptions/#.TjnwbpE96rc.facebook

My Rules for Life...

I've been saying some of these for years. And I do actually follow them. Just as J, as she gets frustrated when I stop for #1. Feel free to add you own. These are just the top ones that came to mind this evening.

Life is to short to pass some things by. Here are some of my own personal rules to life by. Note that they are heavily influenced by my world travels.

1. Never pass up buying a glass of lemonade from kids at a lemonade stand (and don't be cheap, let them keep the change)
2. Never pass up a twix bar at the checkout line. You know know when or if you'll have a chance for another.
3. Never pass up a chance to use a "nice" bathroom. You might be really sorry what your options could be later.
4. Never pass up a warm/hot shower. You might be really sorry you did, and you might not have another chance for a long long long time.
5. Snickers bars were made to eaten frozen. Any other way, well, shame on you...
6. (been said before by others, but I totally agree) Never pass up a chance to hug or kiss one of your kids.
7. Think of something you love about your wife/spouse, everyday. You might be mad, or arguing, or resentful, or just flat out pissed at each other at times. But you are still a team, and you can't do it alone.

Peace

When is the Congo not Congo? When its Colombia...

Sporadic running water, and when it runs, its cold versus Hot water on demand.

The area GSM system coming and going with the Electrical blackout/ power rationing versus ADSL+ all the time

No comfort food to be found anywhere versus abundant Chocolate, Beer, Pasta, and everything else you can find in a fully stocked grocery/department store.

(initially) Gut wrenching, ulcer producing stress versus relaxed days with siesta time

rice, sauce, and some type of meat (think stew) versus empanadas with the most to die for picante you've ever laid a taste bud on

Not a lick of English (only French or Lingala) to be found versus .. ok not a lick of English (a variety of Spanish) to be found

Hot, dry, dusty, not enough of a breeze to cool you down versus Hot, BRIGHT sunny, daily showers, moderate humidity.

Not a family member within 7000 miles versus having had the whole Clan right next to you to share an amazing experience!

Priceless

The Good kind of Stress

I would be easy enough to blow a gasket, not just because it 100+ with the heat index, and it's going to be 112+ the next few days. That wouldn't be so bad if our house didn't have AC. Kowalski (the family dog) and I are laying on the bare flooring the basement for relief.

I would be easy enough to have a cow that the tickets we had on hold to meet, pickup, and return how with our newest daughter in Colombia didn't go up over 60% in price.

I would be easy enough to get crabby and irritable over the number of things, loose ends we are trying to pull together before we leave.

Last night while trying to calm K down after having nightmares (this time over her favorite ladybug pillow pet) for the 2nd day in a row. I started thinking. Maybe I"m fighting God's plan. Fighting his time frame. His use of finances that he's provided to us. Maybe I'm unknowingly trying to swim upstream against the current. Maybe I just need to trust, have faith and let things fall as they might.

Trust in the Lord. Yep. That's the plan now (at least for today until I'm challenged with the next group of frustrations).

Peace