Cause I'm Only Human......Love me for who I am and not for who I am not

Christina Perri tweets: "everything in this video is on purpose. i wrote it. it tells a story. figure it out. xx" "fact: i like who i am #human". From her mouth to mine, I LIKE WHO I AM!

Stand - Not just one word, but my one word

stand

/stand/

verb
- have or maintain an upright position, supported by one's feet
- rise to one's feet
- remain valid or unaltered
- adopt a particular attitude toward a matter or issue

noun
- an attitude toward a particular issue; a position taken in an argument
- determined effort to resist or fight for something
- an act of holding one's ground against or halting to resist an opposing force

And according to the Good Book
Ephesians 6: 11 - 15

11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.
12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.
13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.
14 Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness,
15 and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace.

My One Word

Each year my running brothers and I search, contemplate, and pray for a word.  One word.  The word we want to reflect our upcoming year. Not just the current occurrences and activities, but a word that we'll strive to fulfill.  During our annual reflection run on New Years Eve morning, we all share our words.  During the year we do our best to support each other in helping each other to live the Word.  Its not the time and place to describe here, but my word is "Stand"  On the surface a simple word.  But the more you think about it, and the more you know about our family situation and the challenges we face.  The challenges I face.  I think the Lord provided me with the perfect word.  The cheesy way to think of the work might be in the "Chumbawamba" sense.  "I get knocked down.  But I get up again.  You're never going to keep me down"  But my close friend Chris shared the Ephesians verse above, and frankly that just nailed it better than any words I could put to paper.  When 2014 comes to a close, the measure of the year will be the moment I can say.  "As for me and my family...  We Stood"

My motivational theme song to keep me focus during the challenging patches is this wonderfully appropriate song by Kristian Stanfill "The Stand"

betrayed and thanks

Two words you would not expect to see together in the same sentence.   And yet how profound.

...and on the night when he was betrayed, the Lord Jesus took a loaf of bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it...


Surely and example to all.  Amidst all the adversity and hardships we each face,  we can and should find and dwell on the things we should be Thankful for.

Here is a challenge.   For 7 days before you go to sleep, think of 10 things that happened (or didn't happen) that you are thankful for.  And give thanks to him who deserves it.

Another day in the Neighborhood

Some bloggers post everything and anything, and are consistent no matter what.  Other (like this one), I guess you could say absence makes the heart grow fonder. No that's not right.  Absence makes the brain wonder more?  or Absence make the wonder greater.  What is going on behind the curtain.  If we've been quite, surely there has been enough "activity" to warrant a blog post.   Guess so. Though lately our "activity" results in us needing to circle the wagons.

Halloween is past.  Thankfully without any major, Gi-normous issues.  Wont share them here, but the rollar coaster has been derailed a few times, and those that are in the know, well you are in the know, and its stuff we dont really post here.  Who want to see the neighbors dirty laundry anyone.  Its not as if you are looking to see if their is any more nasty then your own.

Sacrifice for with purpose.   Another opportunity arose.  Ran a marathon without any specific time, rather an "effort goal".  I did run with a group of Faithful men (our group calls ourself the Fellowship of Runners), and they had an aggressive time goal.  In the range of 8:02 - 8:15 per mile for all 26.2 .   Thats a pace I can hold for 7 to 15 miles, beyond that, I would need exceptionally perfect conditions to pull that off.   But I went out with them, hung in as long as I could, again knowing my personal goal was effort.  I did hold the pace for almostt 17 miles.  Slowly the pace crept longer and longer.  Ended up with a very respectable 8:29 pace for a 3:42 marathon.  Perhaps a Personal Record, but I'm not keeping track.  So what of the goal...

It was hard,  hard enough that I wasnt even able to focus so much on all the "sacrifice" I was offering up. But that's OK also.  Just mean I took it up a notch.  When one foot in front of the other, and keep breathing are about the only thoughts,  I'm thinking that alot is being offered up. 

Its no Thanksgiving.  But got a lot to be thankful for.  A great group of men to share some time with.  The ability to run longer distances, and persevere in the effort with the hope the effort will be accepted to bring aid to others.  A Wife the gave me the green light to go ahead and race, and held down the fort whilst I was gone.  A family, however challenging and dysfunctional we are, that keep me on my toes every minute of every day. Employment.    Enough spare change to buy some Chipotle when the need (and yes I do mean need, because sometimes you just need Chipotle) arises.  But mostly thankful that I've maintained my Faith during a year that would have possibly destroyed many men, they jobs, and their families.  

Don't know where the roller coaster is going, when the next derailment is, or when it might come to a peaceful stop.  But for today. The hands are still strong enough to hold on tight.

Peace

Its a Good Morning

I'm sorry, if you don't lifted up, more cheerful, and ready to face the day after listening to this, then you likely don't have a pulse.  Been quite a few morning lately that I would have needed to hear this.  5 Star shout out Mandisa!  Thanks for great song.

Hope you have a Good Morning (too)

Peace

A Headphones on kinda day

Today is a headphones on kinda day.  The kind in which you just tune into all the songs that help you to recharge, relax, refocus.  The kinda songs to calm your mind and body and reawaken your Spirit.

Yep.  Its one of those kinda days.
Peace

A unique view of suffering...

Tri for Hope, Sacrifice with Purpose...

Its right there in the name.  I've found myself sharing the sentiment with others recently.  Namely with regards to some of the races I registered for, and my goals and expectations for them.  Its not about the time, or the training, or a PR.  Its about the effort.  I repeat it often.  Since I am offering up my "effort", my goals are to have a great effort.

Sitting in Adoration, I came across this excerpt from "The Diary of St. Faustina" (343)

True Love is measured by the thermometer if suffering.  Jesus, I thank you for the little daily crosses, for opposition to my endeavors, for the hardships of communal life, for the misinterpretation of my intentions, for humiliations at the hands of others, for the harsh way in which we are treated, for false suspicions, for poor health and lack of strength, for self-denial, for dying to myself, for the lack of recognition in everything, for the upsetting of all my plans.

Now granted, St Faustina is a Saint. She perhaps her perspective is something to aspire to.  Since at least for me, thinking, considering, and accepting of all those daily trials as a gift, as and opportunity...  well that is just easier said than done isn't it.

Peace

Catch My Breath - A therapeutic parenting view?

A day in the Life of an everyday family.  A day in the Life of a everyday family with Children having experienced trauma a very early age.  For those that know, they already know.  For those those don't, they many never know.  You walk, fall, get up.  Walk backwards, fall, get up.  Walk forward, fall again, and get up again.  This is our path, until you find something that sorta works. Something that at least works in that moment.  You learn to tune out all the "helpful" advice from those they don't quite "get it".  You learn to ignore the looks, the stares, judgments, and expressions from strangers observing how we carry ourselves.

[We..our kids] don't wanna be left behind.  Distance was a friend of mine [theirs].  Catching breath in a web of lies 

[We] spend most of our life, Riding waves, playing acrobat.  Shadowboxing the other half [our other half trying to force us into neurotypical, traditional parenting paradigms]. Learning how to react. 

[Where we are all striving to be and get to, if only for a few moments each day]
Addicted to the love [We] found.  Heavy heart, now a weightless cloud.  [We'll] spend the rest of [our] time.  Laughing hard with the windows down.  Leaving footprints all over town.  Keeping Faith Karma comes around

Catching [our] Breath, no one can hold [us] back, [We] ain't got time for that.

You [God] help me see. The beauty in everything [and sometimes you cannot imagine how hard that can be when you see what we see day in/day out]

Catching [our] Breath, letting it go [as Christine says.. just Breath!!], turning [our] cheeks for the sake of the show.  Now that you know, this is [our] lives, [We] won't be told it's supposed to be right. 

Catching [our] Breath, no one can hold [us] back, [We] ain't got time for that.

I heard this song on the radio the other day, and its been stuck, swirling around the old fish bowl noggin.  Downloaded it from Amazon and listened to the lyrics more.  Can't say what Ms Clarkson's reasons for the lyrics are, but they fit nicely into my view of the mindset of this therapeutic parent.  

Peace

Hot and Hot ... but mission accomplished

So completed my first triathlon in 4 years.  Did not have many expectations as I didnt get to the pool very often, and I only got the bike on the road once.  That said, despite some wicked heat and humidity, I did "suffer" through it.  That was goal, and whilst I was thinking about how hard it was, and how I really wasnt enjoying it, I was offering it up.   In the end it was a pretty respectable day for the conditions, and the conditions of my left achilles.

I finish in 2:53:27.  My swim was a very respectable 34min, my bike (as expected was slow) at 1:19:11 with a 18.8mph pace (in years past I would hold a 20 to 21mph pace).  My run was rough, but I expected it to be with the achilles acting up.  My body told me to take walking breaks or it was going to stop listening to me, so I listed to it.  I ended up with the 57:04 on the run, for a 9:12pace.

All in all.  Its was an interesting day. I am not sorry I did it, but if there were thought about this race kick starting my triathlon bug, that did not happen :)   Still would rather run 15+ miles through some hills and streams. 

Thank you Lord for the strength and endurance in my body.  I hope you will except my efforts today, and ease the burden on someone in much greater need.

Peace

3 years and two kids later...

Its been since 2009, and before two adoptions, that I've done my last Triathlon.  I cannot believe it has been that long.  I guess that is what family life, young kids, and Fatherhood will do to you.  It relegates you to running in the weeee, dark hours of the morning.  With the blessing of my better half,  J suggested (demanded more like) that I signup for a TRI in the Great White North.  Well of course I will need a "warm up tri".  So its coming up.  Hope that Achilles in the left leg is up for it.  An Olympic tri, first since the Chicago (Accenture Tri) in 2009.  That took me 2:39:06.  I will surely be slower than that, and that's OK.  With a leg that is giving me pause, no real bike/road training, and only about 6 trips to the pool.  We'll see how it goes.

As the blog name says..

Tri for Hope, Sacrifice with Purpose...


I intend to.